Surely you also have those friends or friends, used to publishing everything they do in their social media. This type of behavior is common especially in couples. On a regular basis, sometimes even daily, they update the walls of their social networks with photographs or statuses describing their relationship, and even their intimacies.
Behind these behaviors there are many explanations that we will detail below. Now, we are not saying that the use of social networks is something negative, absolutely. These channels are definitely great for share positive experiences With those we love, however, we must know the limits and maintain a balance. Let's talk Bezzia on this interesting and controversial topic.
The couple's relationship and social networks
We all like to share the positive aspects of our life on social media. We are happy and good news, like feelings, is always something we like to communicate with our own. Now, we are not going to criticize here what one does or does not do in these media. Our interest is focused on the couple, so let's see what aspects are important when joining these two aspects: couple and social networks.
1. Agree with your partner what is shared and what is not
It has happened more than once. People who upload photographs with their partner to Facebook or Twitter, without his or her consent.
In our relationships, the last thing we should do is take things for granted. Because you love someone, because you are part of their life, you do not have the right to make things public without their permission. Thus, it must be agreed in advance what is published and what is not, what we want to share and what not.
2. Don't share information just to get psychological reinforcement
The profile of many of the people used to sharing every aspect of their lives on social networks could very well be the following:
- They are personalities who seek positive reinforcement for different aspects of their life. Uploading a photograph is getting certain "Likes" in a short space of time. That is, they do not have to go to a party or go down to the street to receive compliments.
- The psychological reinforcements that are obtained in social networks often serve to raise a fairly low self-esteem.
- If your relationship is stable, going well and you are happy, you do not have to need psychological reinforcements from anyone and even less from those acquaintances and strangers who inhabit your Facebook or on Twitter. Who we should worry about is our partner, and it is he who should offer us these recognitions on a day-to-day basis in an intimate and private way.
3. You do not believe in social networks something that you are not
In social networks we can find behaviors of all kinds. From those who create false profiles offering physical and psychological characteristics that do not correspond to reality, to those who seek to highlight certain dimensions in order to "Pretend" a perfect life.
At the couple level, we can see this sometimes in those friends who publish photos with their partners on the beach, having dinner, going on trips, and publishing continuous romantic scenes that draw "That perfect couple" that everyone envies.
You have to find a equilibrium and leave space for privacy. A public life is subject to criticism and comments, therefore, we are exposed to what we do "because we like it" at a given moment, not being well understood by others.
Share photos or statuses publicly with measure and balance. Also think that everything you expose in these media, will be analyzed and even judged by those who are your friends, or by those Facebook acquaintances that you liked at the time, but do not know.
4. Do not think that if you do not appear on social networks "you do not exist"
It is possible that this statement has not been completely clear but we will give you a simple example. A couple plans a trip. When they arrive at their destination, they discover that they have lost the camera and that their (for whatever reason) they don't work.
This means that they will not be able to take photos of their trip. And even more, that they will not be able to share everything they do on that vacation on their social networks. What then is the first thought? If I don't share it, it's like I haven't made this trip, I can't prove to my friends that "I have been here" with my partner.
It may seem somewhat exaggerated, but it is a very common reality. So keep these dimensions in mind:
- Social networks are a great tool for communication, perfect for sharing information and experiences. However, real life is not on that mobile or computer screen. The life that can bring you the most gratifications is the one you build with your partner.
- Keep a balance between the two spaces. That not carrying your mobile with you to take that selfie with your partner will take away your smiles. Happiness is on the street, in that breeze on the sea, in the taste of those dinners or in that walk in the park.
- What matters is intimacy with your partner, the one that nobody else cares because it is not public. Because you two build it in secret and because nobody else cares. Your love is yours and your partner's, it is not something to share on social networks.