It is not always easy to permanently break ties with our ex partner. Although most of the time it is not only the most appropriate, but it is the healthiest. We need a psychic and emotional well-being where we can restart our life, and for this, it is necessary to move forward in solitude away from that person. Without establishing any contact. Forgive, accept and leave any relationship behind, having acquired an experience and learning from what has been lived.
This would be how we say the healthiest. Now, what happens when there are still certain links, certain emotions that prevent us from closing that door forever? In fact, there are many couples who return to restart your relationship after being separated for a while. Let's analyze today in Bezzia this reality, let's see if it is the most convenient and what dimensions we should take into account.
Go back with your ex? Before, keep these aspects in mind
Is it appropriate to return with our ex-partner? First of all, we must clarify that there is no correct answer. Each person, each relationship is its own universe full of particular experiences. So there is no formula that can serve us all. However, we must be aware of a number of dimensions before taking that step. They are worth keeping in mind.
1. What caused the separation? Does that problem still exist?
A separation is never easy for either member of the couple, but sometimes, there is one who is more hurt than the other. Let's assume that there has been an infidelity, in that case we must assess the following aspects:
- To overcome an infidelity and restart the relationship with our partner, it must first exist A sorry. If we are not able to forgive what happened, we can hardly trust again. And a relationship without trust is not a healthy relationship.
- We must be aware that a betrayal, a lie or a disappointment, they can never forget. Forgiveness can do a lot for us, but the memory will be there and we must ask ourselves if that feeling will allow us to start our relationship again.
It is necessary to analyze and understand what caused our relationship to end in the past. If the causes are still present today, trying to rebuild that relationship will have a cost. Distrust and fear will continue to exist. So, and in the first place, the healthiest thing is that those problems that separated us before, are face or they are solved.
2. Examine your current situation. Is it worth a try?
It may have been a while since you left your relationship. That new meeting with your ex-partner has filled you with those emotions that you thought you had forgotten, you perceive that there is still a certain attraction and you consider whether to return or not. Analyze these dimensions first.
- do you think it's worth it? Today you have rebuilt your life, you've gotten over what happened and you feel good about yourself. It is necessary that you value the possibility of suffering again what you left behind when you ended the relationship.
- Keep in mind that a relationship is not based solely on love or physical attraction. An adequate coexistence is necessary, where there is respect, understanding, empathy, commitment and good communication. Evaluate all these aspects with objectivity and remember what made you break the relationship.
3. Assess what you can win and what you can lose
Restart the relationship with your ex partner it is something that you are going to have to meditate objectively. It is not the same as falling in love for the first time, there where everything is new and we explore that relationship day by day with enthusiasm and hope.
Trying again with a person we left for a certain reason requires more caution because we are aware that there is a cost. And that cost is the fear of suffer again, to make mistakes and experience a new failure.
Sometimes, there are people who take the step and start living with their ex-partner again at her insistence. Love still exists, there is no doubt, however, the price for trying again assumes that our Self esteem is violated. We find ourselves in the same situations that hurt us before and we wonder why we have fallen again. Not only will we end up developing more negative emotions towards our partner, but our self-concept will be very damaged.
Rate each of these aspects:
- It is possible that the distance and that time of separation has allowed you to mature as people. Talk to your ex-partner, and assess between the two of you what you want to contribute to each other.
- Take on the mistakes made in the past and expose improvement strategies.
- It is not enough just to perceive that the other person still loves you. As you already know, that love must always be healthy and sincere, not a toxic love that seeks only its own benefit and to keep us by its side at all costs.
Sometimes it is worth trying again. People learn from our mistakes and mature, but always keep your own in mind emotional well-being and your integrity. You are free to want to try again, but you are also free to give a negative and protect yourself from something that can hurt you again. In yourself is the choice and the responsibility. Is it worth starting the relationship with our ex-partner? There is no correct answer, each couple is unique and each person has their own needs. Find out which ones are yours and make the most reasonable decision.