Children need their parents to solve their basic needs (food, hygiene, rest, etc.) from a very young age since they cannot do it themselves. That is why there are too many wake-up calls by parts of these to their parents, both educational and emotional.
Many parents try to make these calls for attention solved quickly so that your child never lacks anything, however, it is very easy to cross a fine line of affection and efforts-education that will harm the little one if it is not corrected in time during growth.
If a father / mother overprotects his child too much, the little one will get used to doing nothing by himself, that is, he will get used to give it all done. This will cause problems in certain everyday situations that you will have to face, such as:
- Conflict between friends.
- Responsibilities at home or at school.
- Duty to exams.
- Situations in your daily life.
For all these reasons, it is important to leave the little ones and, especially in adolescence, to let the children resolve and confront these situations, according to their age, naturally and without any fear so that they themselves have the capacity for decision and action.
Sins committed by overprotective parents
- Do not buy from children - That is, do not always say yes to all your whims or barter to buy something in exchange for a responsibility that you have to do because it is a duty. Also, this happens a lot in divorces and separations.
- Not be your colleagues - Children are our children who must understand that they owe us respect above all else.
- Don't let the world revolve around them - This will cause to create arrogant beings and without feelings causing many disappointments in life.
- Do not try to reason with the child in the middle of an argument - You do not have to explain things to the child when he cries because that way he will not understand it because of his impulsiveness. Let him calm down and then reason with him.
- Do not let them set the standards and rhythms of life - Our environment is increasingly changing but they should not follow guidelines through their insecurity since it will end in failure.
- Responsibilities to win prizes - There are many children who do not value their toys or money so they must know how hard it costs to earn it to buy everything they have. In this way, instilling in them small tasks from a young age will encourage them to look more at everything.
- Not letting communicate - Parents should allow children to communicate alone and with others, so they will defend themselves against any manipulation and accept criticism.
Tips for Overprotective Parents
Parents with their infinite concern that nothing happens to their children make them beings insecure, distrustful and fearful attracting consequences in the future. Real life is risky and, much to our regret, children must be allowed to live life to its fullest by falling and getting up every time they stumble over the stones of life.
Therefore, parents must understand that their children are little people who have to help and pamper to a certain extent, gradually offering you an independence to become brave and independent children who face the challenges of life.
On the other hand, parents also have to understand that their children should insert themselves into society little by little and by themselves, although they do giving them the love and support they need, delimiting that line that we mentioned before, advising and guiding them at all times.
How to act so as not to fall before its charms?
Parents are always in 'alert mode' to act before any immense danger that causes harm to their child, in addition to running before any call for attention no matter how vague it may be. This overprotection is more the fault of the parents than of the children, since they take advantage of the affection of mom and dad to get more than they already have.
Therefore, these parents must overcome that fear and let their children live their lives independently and autonomously, having a personal, original and own existence.
For children between 0 and a year and a half We must let him play alone in his room or in the company of a friend, always watching them from afar. In this way, an interrelational relationship is produced between them, thus fostering a bond of friendship.
On the other hand, you have to leave an approximate time of 2-3 minutes between crying and your approach, so that he understands that crying does not solve anything, a good explanation is worth more than two tears, even though it moves us.
Also, when start walking it is recommended that you separate yourself from him so that you can observe and explore the world around you. If at certain times he plays alone, you also have to leave them for a while to favor his autonomy.
On the other hand, for much older children, between 2-5 years old, you have to start motivating them with small responsibilities, like accompanying you to the supermarket and putting things in the cart, then ordering the groceries at home, putting away their toys after playtime, walking the dog, to put the dirty clothes in the basket when it is time for the bath, etc.
Overprotection does not strengthen or prepare children for routine life, so all this will be beneficial for solve certain serious problems both in their teens and adulthood.