La partner's choice It is usually something we do with the feeling, but sometimes the voice of reason tells us to get away from that person. Ignoring it can lead us to start a relationship that was already going to end badly from the beginning. That is why we must take into account the phases that one goes through when meeting someone and when it is time to stop to think about whether that person is the right person for us, so that we can choose the partner well.
Falling in love with someone takes time. Although nowadays there is talk of lovemaking and everything seems to be going fast-motion, we must take our time when making a decision as important as having a partner. The couple should be one more aspect of our life that we can enjoy together and that brings us something good, so it is always important to ask if that person can give us all that.
The first step, the attraction
Without attraction it is true that the spark does not arise and that falling in love needs a dose of simple physical attraction to occur. In this part we let ourselves go, since sometimes we do not even know why a specific person attracts us. In this step we may not yet know the person, so we usually idealize them based on the few details and information we have about them. It is easy to be attracted to another person and it is a matter of chemistry in our brain, but to go further we must also take into account other factors.
Meet the person
When we meet the person we already begin to realize if you have our same values, lifestyle or interests. It does not have to be a person equal to us, since if it were, it would not contribute anything, but it is true that there are things that should be shared. It is difficult to carry on a couple for example when one person lives with animals and the other person does not like them at all. These are things that can create problems in a relationship in the long run. At this point the chemistry can continue and this is when we must stop to think.
Add the rational part
This is usually the step that everyone goes over. We really like a person but we have not yet fallen in love with him, so we are in time to avoid the suffering that comes with starting a relationship that will end badly. This is when we have to ask if we want to start something with that person. One way to put it rationally is to make a list with the pros and cons of the person or with those aspects that may be a problem for us. Sometimes at this point we prefer to let ourselves be carried away by the heart and deceive ourselves about those details. We know that it is not easy to find another person to connect with and who attracts us physically, but it is important to be realistic about the person and the type of relationship we can have with them. If at this point we stop and analyze it coldly, we will avoid falling in love with who does not suit us.
Move on to infatuation
If we realize that this person fits into our life, then we can let ourselves go and get to know it thoroughly. It is easy to fall in love once we have gone through the attraction and knowledge of the other person. If we see that there are aspects that can pose a problem, we will have to raise them in case they can be fixed or slow down the relationship a bit until we have clearer ideas.