Ukusebenzisa ulawulo olugqithisileyo kwisibini yinto eyenza ubudlelwane bube yityhefu, okukhokelela ekuwohlokeni okukhulu kwayo. Nangona kunjalo, kukho abantu abaninzi namhlanje abalawula isibini ukuba sidinwe. Ulawulo aluzalwa ngenjongo yokulimaza umntu othandekayo kodwa kungenxa yokungakhuselekanga komntu olawulayo ohluphekayo.
Ukuze ugweme ulawulo olunjalo, kubalulekile ukufumana izizathu zesimo sengqondo esinjalo kunye baphathe ngokufanelekileyo nangokufanelekileyo. Kwinqaku elilandelayo siza kuthetha ngezizathu okanye izizathu zokuba kutheni le mfuneko yokulawula iqabane lenzeka kwaye yintoni enokuyenza ukulungisa imeko enjalo.
Isidingo sokulawula iqabane
Kukho izizathu ezininzi okanye izizathu ezinokubangela ukuba umntu alawule iqabane lakhe:
- Oyena nobangela wolawulo olunjalo kungenxa yengxaki enkulu yokungakhuseleki kunye nokuzithemba. Ukulawula abantu kubuthathaka kakhulu xa kufikwa kwisidima sabo kwaye abanakuzithemba kakhulu. Oku kungakhuselekanga kuguqulela kumandla okulawula phezu kwesibini esenza umonakalo omkhulu kubudlelwane.
- Kungenzeka ukuba imfuno yokulawula iqabane ngenxa yokungathembeki okuthile kweqabane. Kuyinto eqhelekileyo ukuba ngenxa yesiqendu esinye okanye ngaphezulu sokungathembeki, omnye wamaqela kubudlelwane unesidingo sokulawula iqabane labo.
- Umntu osebenzisa ulawulo olunjalo kwiqabane unokucinga ukuba ukuziphatha okunjalo kokulawula yeyona ndlela yokuphepha iingxaki ezithile kunye ukufumana ukhuseleko oluthile kubudlelwane. Nangona kunjalo, olu hlobo lweengcinga zokulawula luya kugqiba lunxibe ikamva elihle lesi sibini kwaye lubeke emngciphekweni omkhulu ubudlelwane obudalwe phakathi kwabantu bobabini.
Indlela yokuphepha ukulawula isibini
Ukulawula isibini kwenziwa ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo kunye neendlela: ukophula isithuba sobuqu kunye nesisondeleleneyo somnye umntu, ukuxhaphaza kwinqanaba leemvakalelo okanye ukunyelisa zonke izenzo zabo. Akukho mntu kufuneka anyamezele ukulawulwa ngokuqhubekayo liqabane lakhe kwaye ukuba oku kuyenzeka, kubalulekile ukufuna izisombululo eziphelisa ulawulo olunjalo. Esinye sezisombululo kukuya kwingcali ekwaziyo ukuphelisa ingxaki enjalo.
Olunye lolona nyango lusebenzayo xa kufikwa kunyango lolawulo lwamandla phakathi kwesibini kukuziphatha kwengqondo.. Ngolu nyango, umntu olawulayo uyakwazi ukunyanga ikhwele lakhe le-pathological kunye nokungathembeki kwakhe kwiqabane lakhe.
Ngamafutshane, ukungakhuseleki, ukuzithemba okuphantsi kunye nokungathembeki kwesi sibini baya konakala ngendlela eyingozi ubudlelwane obusekwe phakathi kwabantu ababini. Ukuba isimo sengqondo sokulawula asijongwanga, izinto zinokuba mbi ngakumbi kwaye zibeke esichengeni ubuhlobo. Ukunikezelwa oku, into eseleyo ukuyenza kukusombulula ingxaki ngokuzibeka ezandleni zengcali okanye ukuphelisa ubudlelwane obunothando phakathi kwabantu ababini.