Iingcali zigcina ukuba phakathi kwesiqingatha ukuya kuthi ga kwi-80% yonxibelelwano phakathi kwabantu ayithethi. Akukho mathandabuzo, unxibelelwano olungasebenzisi magama lunefuthe kwaye lunokwenza okanye lwaphule umyalezo. Olu hlobo lonxibelelwano ludlulela ngaphaya kokusilela nje ukuthetha.
Zizijekulo zezandla, ukudibana kwamehlo, ukuma, intshukumo yomzimba kunye nendlela esityekesa ngayo okanye esinqwala ngayo intloko. Yindlela esizibonakalisa ngayo kunye nendlela uluntu olusamkela ngayo. Unxibelelwano olungazenzisiyo ludlala indima ebalulekileyo ekusasazeni imiyalezo ngabom nengajongwanga, ngoko ke kubalulekile ukuyithathela ingqalelo kwaye uyenze ngokufanelekileyo.
Kodwa uzibona njani iimpawu ezingezizo ezolwimi onazo? Uzihlengahlengisa njani ukuze ube nesiphumo esisiso? Ukuqala, kufuneka uqonde imiqondiso engeyiyo yelizwi oyithumelayo. Jonga esipilini, iteyiphu yevidiyo ngokwakho, okanye umhlobo okanye umntu osebenza naye akujonge kwincoko elinganisiweyo kwaye unike impendulo. Usenokumangaliswa koko ukubonayo noko ukufundayo.
Unxibelelwano lwakho olungasebenzisi magama
Kunxibelelwano lwakho olungasebenzisi lizwi, sisijekulo sakho esithetha ngaphandle kwamagama, ke ngoko, kufuneka uthathele ingqalelo oku kulandelayo:
- Qwalasela ukuma. Kufuneka uthe tye ngokukhululekileyo, ungqiyame kumntu othetha naye ukuze udlulise umyalezo ovulelekileyo nofikelelekayo. Ngokwahlukileyo koko, ukuthozama okanye ukufulathela umntu kunokukwenza ubonakale unomsindo okanye ungangeneki.
- Zinyamekele iingalo zakho. Iingalo zakho kufuneka zikhululeke ecaleni kwakho okanye ethangeni lakho ukuba uhleli. Ukuba ukwipodium okanye itafile, iingalo zakho zinokuphumla kwinto leyo. Sukuwela iingalo zakho, ukhomba ngeminwe, okanye usebenzise izijekulo zengalo ezigwenxa. Abantu abaninzi ngokwemvelo benza izimbo zomzimba ngezandla zabo xa bethetha. Qaphela eyakho kwaye usebenze ukuzola iintshukumo. Ukubeka izandla esinqeni sakho okanye emva komqolo wakho kunokuthumela umyalezo wokuba unesithukuthezi, unomsindo, okanye awumnandanga.
- Uqhagamshelo lwamehlo oluqinileyo. Abantu abangajongi abanye emehlweni okanye abawatshintshiyo amehlo abo ababonakali bethembekile. Usenako ukuphonononga amanqaku, kodwa qiniseka ukuba amehlo akho anxibelelana nomntu othetha naye uninzi lwencoko. Abanye abantu bayaqhwanyaza ngokukhawuleza xa besoyika, okanye bayaqhwanyaza kancinane xa benikela ingqalelo. Zombini ezi zinto azikho ngokwendalo kwaye ziyakuphazamisa kumyalezo ozama ukuwuthumela.
- Nikela ingqalelo kwimbonakalo yobuso. Indlela abantu abathetha ngayo iyatshintsha ngokuxhomekeke kwixesha okanye indlela abaziva ngayo. Intetho yakho nganye iya kudlulisa umyalezo kwaye inokuguqula indlela yencoko.
- Yehlisa ukungazinzi kwakho. Iifidgeters zihlala zibonwa njengezikruqukileyo, ezingenamonde, okanye eziphazamisekileyo. Ngokuxhomekeke kumkhwa wakho wokudlala, usenokubonakala unexhala okanye unomsindo. Imizekelo apha iquka ukubamba okanye ukubamba iminwe, ukudlala ngezikhonkwane, ukubamba okanye ukujikelezisa iipeni okanye ezinye izinto ezincinci, kunye nokutshintsha rhoqo imilenze okanye indawo yokuhlala.
- Nikela ingqalelo kuqhawulo lonxibelelwano phakathi kwamazwi akho kunye namazwi angathethwayo. Owona mzekelo uqhelekileyo woku uthi wonwabile okanye “ulungile” ngelixa ufinge iintshiyi namagxa akho egobile. Oku akuhambelani kwaye kunokwenza abanye abantu bangonwabi. Okubi nakakhulu, kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba xa kukho ukuziphatha okungahambelaniyo kwincoko, abantu baya kugxila kwimiyalezo engachazwanga. Emva koko iimvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo ziya koyisa.