Uxinzelelo, iingxaki zemihla ngemihla kunye nokungabikho kothando kunye nothando olucacileyo, kunokukhokelela kwiingxabano ezithile eziphela ziluphelisa ulwalamano. Nangona kunjalo, kukho umkhuba onokunceda ukuqinisa ubudlelwane kunye nokukhuthaza unxibelelwano olusebenzayo ngakumbi: ukuqaphela.
Kwinqaku elilandelayo siza kukuxelela iingenelo zokuziqhelanisa nokukhumbula okunokuba nazo kwesi sibini kunye nendlela enokusetyenziswa ngayo.
Yintoni ingqondo?
Ukuqiqa lusiko oluye lwafumana ukuthandwa kwiminyaka yakutshanje kwaye lubandakanya ukunikela ingqalelo kumava ahlukeneyo, ukuhlakulela isimo sengqondo sokuvuleleka kunye nokufuna ukwazi. Ukuziqhelanisa rhoqo nengqiqo kusivumela ukuba siphuhlise ukuqonda ngakumbi kweengcinga kunye neemvakalelo,
Zeziphi iingenelo zokuba nengqiqo kwesi sibini?
- Inceda ukuphucula unxibelelwano phakathi kwamaqela. Ukuqiqa kusinceda simamele iqabane lethu, siphephe iziphazamiso kunye nezigwebo. Oku kwenza unxibelelwano lucace ngakumbi kwaye lube novelwano ngakumbi, ukuphepha iingxabano kunye neengxabano phakathi kwamaqela.
- Womeleza unxibelelwano lweemvakalelo phakathi kwesibini. Uqhagamshelwano lomelele kwaye lubalulekile kangangokuba ukuxhasana kucace gca kwaye ukwanda kobudlelwane obusondeleyo kwenzeka kwinqanaba leemvakalelo.
- Yehlisa uxinzelelo kunye nexhala phakathi kwesibini. Ukuqiqa kunciphisa ukuxinezeleka ngokweemvakalelo phakathi kwesibini kwaye kwenza amaqela alungele ngakumbi xa kuziwa ekujonganeni nemingeni yexesha elizayo.
- Ukhuthaza uvelwano kwisibini. Umntu ngamnye unakho ukuqonda ngokugqibeleleyo iinkqubo zakhe zangaphakathi kwaye, ngenxa yoku, baziva bexhotyisiwe xa kufikwa ekuqondeni amava ahlukeneyo esi sibini.
- Inceda ukusombulula iingxabano ezahlukeneyo. Umkhwa wokucinga ufanelekile ekulawuleni nasekulawuleni iimvakalelo. Oku kungundoqo xa kuziwa ekusombululeni iingxabano kunye nokuphepha iimpembelelo ezithile ezinokonakalisa ubudlelwane.
Indlela yokwenza ingqondo njengesibini
Musa ukulahlekelwa zinkcukacha kwezi zikhokelo okanye iingcebiso oko kuya kukunceda uziqhelanise nenkathalo kunye neqabane lakho:
- Kubalulekile ukuba rhoqo nizinike ixesha lokuziqhelanisa nengqiqo njengesibini. Isenokubandakanya ukuphefumla kunye nemithambo yokuphumla.
- Ukuziqhelanisa nokumamela ngenkuthalo yenye indlela yokuziqhelanisa nokuba nengqiqo kunye neqabane lakho.Ngale ndlela xa iqabane lakho lithetha nawe, ubeke yonke ingqalelo yakho kumazwi akhe. Musa ukuphazamisa kwaye ubonise umdla koko iqabane lakho likuxelela lona.
- Zama ukuba novelwano kangangoko unako ngesi sibini. Kufuneka uqonde iimvakalelo zeqabane lakho kwaye umbonise inkxaso kangangoko. ngamaxesha athile antsonkothileyo nanzima.
- Kuhle ukusebenzisa ithuba lemihla ngemihla ukuziqhelanisa nokuqaphela njengesibini. Nikonwabele ukutya njengesibini, hambani niyobethwa ngumoya okanye niwolelane kakhulu. Yindlela yokuziqhelanisa nengqiqo nomntu wakho omthandayo.
- Kwimeko apho kukho imilo ethile, kungcono ukuyisombulula ngokuqwalasela. Akulunganga ukuba nemincili kakhulu kwaye uphelelwe ngumonde. Eyona nto icetyiswayo kukuthatha umoya onzulu kwaye ujonge esona sisombululo sinokuba luncedo kumacala omabini.
- Ukunyamekela kuya kubandakanya ukuzinyamekela. Kuhle ukuba ulwalamano luchithe ixesha lokunyamekela impilo-ntle kabani engokwasemzimbeni nengokweemvakalelo.
Ngamafutshane, akukho mathandabuzo ukuba umkhuba engqondweni inceda ukuqinisa ubudlelwane besibini. Ndiyabulela kulo mkhuba, unxibelelwano luphuculwe, uxinzelelo kunye nokuxhalaba kuyancipha, kwaye uvelwano lukhuthazwa. Ke ngoko, ungalibazisi ukudibanisa ingqondo phakathi kwesibini kwaye usebenzise inzuzo nganye eya kuzisa kuyo. Njengoko ixesha lihamba, ubudlelwane buya kuba namandla ngakumbi kwaye unxibelelwano lweemvakalelo phakathi kwamaqela luya kuba lukhulu kwaye lubaluleke kakhulu.