Loveaunar soyayya. Dukanmu muna da tunanin abin da muke da shi na cikakken abokin tarayya, mutumin da ya san yadda zai fahimce mu, ya saurare mu, wanda yake ba mu dariya kuma wanda, a zahiri, zai iya faranta mana rai. Samun manufofi ba dadi bane, akasin haka, yana ba mu damar bayyana abin da muke so wa kanmu, yana bambanta duk waɗancan matakan da ba za mu yarda da su ba. Abu ne mai lafiya.
Yanzu, idan ya zo ga magana game da "soyayyar soyayya", wani lokacin mukan yi kuskuren ɗaukar wasu ra'ayoyin ƙarya waɗanda, ta wata hanyar, duniyar silima da adabi ta sayar da mu. Muna son yin imani da soyayya ta har abada, cikin ƙaddara da kuma wannan kusan sadaukar da kai wanda ya haɗa mutane biyu. Koyaya, dole ne ku yi hankali saboda waɗannan ra'ayoyin kuma sun haɗa da ra'ayoyi kamar cikakkiyar ibada, mallaka, ko rikicewa kishi a matsayin bayyanar da soyayya... Dole ne mu yi hattara. Yau in Bezzia, muna so mu shiga cikin wannan sanannen ra'ayi: Ƙaunar soyayya.
Myarya ta ƙaryar soyayya ta soyayya
1. Soyayya har abada ce
Lokacin da muke cikin ƙauna muna so muyi tunanin cewa abin da muke ji yanzu ya kasance madawwami, yarjejeniya Ya kamata ya kasance har zuwa ƙarshen rayuwarmu Wasu lokuta ana cika shi, babu shakka, amma kafin a mai da hankali kan wannan ra'ayin yana da kyau muyi la'akari da waɗannan fannoni:
- Ana auna soyayya a cikin nan da yanzu, a wannan lokacin. Shin yanzu kuna farin ciki? Shin kana tashi da safe cikin farin ciki da murmushi? Wannan shine ainihin mahimmanci, waɗannan ƙananan abubuwan da ke tabbatar da farin cikin yau da kullun.
- Ba za mu iya musun cewa akwai soyayyar da za ta dawwama a rayuwa ba, amma akwai kuma ƙaunatattun ƙauna waɗanda suka cancanci a rayu daidai. Kuma daga dukkanmu zamu iya koya da wadatar da kanmu.
2. An kaddara mutane da "sauran rabinmu"
Ya wanzu el destino cikin soyayya? Yana iya kasancewa, rayuwa cike take da abubuwan da suka faru daidai, amma yanzu, mai yiyuwa ne a duk tsawon rayuwar ka, zaka samu rabin jikin ka da yawa, kuma ba mutum daya ba.
Karka taba kusantar da kanka da sabbin damar idan ka sami gazawar motsin rai. Idan waccan dangantakar da kuke zaton shine mutumin cikin rayuwarku ta lalace, to, kada ku taɓa rufe ƙofofina cikin zuciyar ka tunanin cewa babu wata dama ta biyu ko kuma "soyayyar soyayya" ta kare a gare ku. Kuskure ne.
3. Soyayya itace sha’awa
Labarin tatsuniyoyi na soyayyar soyayya ya kunshi asalin so a matsayin tushen soyayya, a matsayin hanya daya tilo ta bayyana jin dadi tsakanin mutane biyu. Waɗannan sune matakan farko na son ɗabi'a da aka ɗora da su sha'awar jima'i, na tsananin ji inda babu wasu kalmomin tsakiya.
Lokacin da sha'awa ta faɗi, soyayya, bisa ga wannan hanyar, ya kamata ta ɓace. Babu shakka wannan wata karya ce, tunda kamar yadda kuka sani, ma'aurata yawanci sukan bi ta hanyoyi daban-daban inda alƙawarin ba zai taɓarɓarewa ba, har ma da ƙaramar soyayya. Mai yiwuwa ne a rasa ƙarfin shekarun farkon biyu, amma mun sami kusanci da aiki tare.
4. Loveauna ita ce cikakkiyar ibada ga ɗayan mutum
A cikin mafi shahararriyar ma'anar soyayyar soyayya, galibi akwai hoton mace da ya karkata ga abokiyar zamanta, kusan soyayya. hanya mara son kai. Gaskiya ne cewa yayin da muke soyayya masoyi ya zama duniyarmu gaba daya, amma dole ne mu kiyaye kar mu zama wani irin "tauraron dan adam" da yake zagaye duniya.
- Karka taba rasa asalin ka, kai agirman kai.
- Loveauna ba shine a ba komai ba tare da karɓar wani abu ba, akasin haka, ƙaunaci wani shine tsammanin rabon jituwa da amincewa, shine girmama juna yayin ba da damarmu damar haɓaka ɗayan ɗayan kuma a matsayin ma'aurata.
- Fiye da cikakkiyar sadaukarwa, abin da ma'aurata masu lafiya ke inganta shi ne son "haɗa kai", don sanin juna da sanin abin da juna ke fata na iya kawo mana farin ciki tsakanin su biyun.
5. Soyayya zata iya komai
Dole ne kuma mu yi hankali tare da wannan ɗabi'ar gama gari wacce ke bayyana soyayya ta soyayya. Shin gaskiya ne cewa soyayya zata iya magance komai? Wani lokaci a, amma ba koyaushe ba. Dukanmu mun san cewa a lokuta da dama, duk irin ƙaunar da muke wa mutum, bai isa ya ci gaba da zama tare da su ba. Babu idan babu girmamawa, misali.
- Bayanan "soyayya ta rinjayi duka" Wani lokaci ana amfani dashi azaman uzuri don musun rikice-rikice da yawa a cikin dangantakar, koda a matsayin nau'i na baƙar fata. "Idan da gaske kuna ƙaunata, za ku bar wannan aikin don kasancewa tare da ni", "Na san kuna ƙaunata, saboda haka na san cewa ba za ku iya hana ni abin da nake tambayar ku ba." Tunani ne wanda dole ne muyi taka tsantsan dashi.
6. Labarin kishi
- Don ƙaunar soyayya, idan babu kishi, shine bamu jin kauna ta gaskiya. Yana da, don yin magana, alama ce da ba za a iya ganewa ba ta ainihin sha'awar da ke tsakanin mutane biyu inda kishi yake kamar nau'in haraji. Tabbas tunanin wannan babban haɗari ne, inda zaka iya faɗawa cikin haɗari mai haɗari wanda mamaya, rashin yarda da farin ciki ya mamaye shi.
- Kishi baya da lafiya, Kishi shine hanyar tafiya lalata kowace rana dangantakarmu da cewa dole ne mu taɓa rikicewa da ƙauna. Duk wanda yake tunanin zaku ci amanarsa kuma yayi kokarin mallake ku don kada ku barshi, to shi ba ya mutunta ku a matsayinku na mutum. Ka tuna da shi.
A ƙarshe, yana da daraja la'akari da wannan jerin ra'ayoyin waɗanda galibi suna bayyana ma'anar soyayya. Wannan ba zai hana shi daga kasancewa mai ƙima ba don ci gaba da yin imani da yawancin ƙa'idodin su, a cikin kyakkyawar alaƙar da za ta iya rayuwa tsawon rayuwa. Alkawari ne madawwami wanda ya kawo mu mafi kyawun taya murna.