Njengokuhlala, kukhona ezinye izingqinamba ezivela ekuthandaneni nendoda endala, lokhu kwenzeka ikakhulukazi lapho ukucwaswa komphakathi okuhambisana naye kubonakala kakhulu ... Uma unendoda endala futhi ungazi noma uqhubeke nobudlelwano, kuzodingeka ucabange ngalokhu izinzuzo lokho ekucabangayo, kepha futhi nokubi ...
Hlangana nomndeni
Uma kukhulunywa ngobudlelwano nendoda esikhulile, ungahle ube nezimo ezinkulu zokukhathazeka noma kungaba ibhola lezinzwa lapho kufika isikhathi sokuhlangana nomndeni wakhe. Ungaze ucabange nokuqeda lobu budlelwano ngoba umehluko weminyaka yinto abazali abaningi abangayamukeli. Lokhu kuvame ukuba yinkinga enkulu kwabesifazane abanobaba ngokwesiko, hhayi ukuvuleka komqondo nokuvikela ngokweqile.
Nokho, Uma uyikhathalela ngempela futhi uyayithanda le ndoda onayo lapho-ke abazali bakho kuzofanele bafunde ukuhlala nayo (kubaluleke kakhulu ukukhumbula). Ngokusobala, awunandaba nokwehluka kweminyaka, ngakho-ke thatha lolo suku "lomhlangano wabazali" njenganoma iyiphi enye.
Angatshela abazali bakhe ukuthi uzizwa kanjani ngaye, imininingwane ngesoka lakho, nangobudlelwano bayo obuzuzisayo. Kungcono ukwenza lokhu ngaphambi kokuthi bahlangane naye njengoba kuyindlela enhle yokubasiza. Vele ungalethi umehluko weminyaka lapho wenza lokhu, mabazwe ukuthi uzizwa kanjani ngaye nokuthi umangalisa kangakanani. Bazothola umehluko weminyaka lapho behlangana naye, ngethemba ukuthi lokho obatshele khona "kuzokwehlisa ukushaya."
Izindlela ezahlukahlukene zokuphila
Ngenkathi umncane futhi uzama ukufeza amaphupho akho ngokuhamba, ibhizinisi eliyingozi noma ngisho nokuhlala phesheya ukuze uphumelele noma ufeze izinhloso zakho. Umuntu wakho ngeke abambe iqhaza. Ngeshwa lokhu kuyinkinga enkulu lapho uthandana nendoda esikhulile, ngoba ngenkathi usahlola futhi uhlola impilo, usevele unakho.
Okuxakayo-ke ukuthi, pro ukuba nobudlelwano nendoda esikhulile ukuthi ukulungele kanjani ukuzibophezela nokuzinza ngoba usekwenzile lokho kwezinye izingxenye eziningi zempilo. Kuphi njengoba, ungenakho, okwenza lokhu kube yinkinga kwezinye izimo.
Futhi, lapho ufuna ukuphuma ebusuku noma emcimbini, kungahle kungabi ngoba usuqedile ngaleso sigaba sempilo, ngakho-ke kunokwehluka kuzindlela zokuphila ezishayisanayo, ngaphandle kokuthi ngizimisele ukukuzama, futhi ngokufanayo
Unesikhathi esedlule
Uma uthandana nendoda esikhulile, ungena ebudlelwaneni wazi ukuthi unokwedlule. Kodwa-ke, kungenzeka ukuthi wawushadile noma uganile, wawunobudlelwano obuningi (okunye okungathí sina, okunye okungajwayelekile), noma ngisho nezingane. Ngoba usekhulile, akungabazeki ukuthi uhlangabezane nakho futhi wenze okuningi kakhulu kunawe.
Amigos
Abangani bakhe bazozibuza ukuthi kungani unaye nokuthi nihlangane kanjani. Abangani bakho bazokubuza umbuzo ofanayo futhi bangashintsha nendlela abasabela ngayo kuwe. Le nkinga ifana kakhulu nalapho uhlangana nabazali bakho.
Ukujola nowesilisa osekhulile kungafana nokuthandana nowesilisa osemncane. Kunezinsizwa ezimbalwa ezimangazayo ezikhulile, ezinamazinga aphakeme, ezinakekelayo, ezihlakaniphile, ezinothando, ezizibophezele, ezithembekile futhi ezinamazinga aphezulu njengendoda esikhulile. Kodwa-ke, iqiniso ukuthi la madoda ayingcosana futhi aqhele kakhulu futhi lokho kwenza ukuba nobudlelwano nendoda endala kuyindlela engcono kakhulu kwabesifazane abaningi.
Ngangihlala ngithandana nabesifazane (kakhulu) abadala kunami kuze kuthi, lapho ngineminyaka engaba ngu-40, kwenzeka ukuthi ngithandane nentombazane eneminyaka eyi-10 izinyanga eziyishumi.Izinto ezimbili ezangikhathalela ngokukhethekile kokuhlangenwe nakho:
- Ukujwayela "izinkinga zangempela", ngiqonde ukuthi uma kwenzeka okuthile okwaletha ukungezwani kulaba abashadayo kwakuvame ukuba yinto ebucayi ngempela, izinto ezazimkhathaza zazilula ukubhekana nami ukuthi ngangiphila ngikhululeke kakhulu. Kubonakale kuye ukuthi nginazo zonke izimpendulo, futhi engangikucabanga ukuthi "akuzona zonke, kodwa okungenani bengivele ngizifundile kulezi zifundo ngenkathi kuyithuba lami."
- Uma unomuntu ohluke kakhulu kuwe, ukuphela kwendlela izinto ezingasebenza ngayo ukuthi ngamunye wenu abe nendawo eningi yokugcina ubunikazi bakhe. Ngangidinga isikhathi sezinto zami ezazimkhathaza, futhi ngangingafuni ukuzibandakanya nasempilweni yakhe yezenhlalo ngoba wayengenalutho olufanayo nabangane bakhe (okwathi ngomgwaqo bangibiza ngokuthi "umzanyana") futhi kubonakala kunempilo kuye ukuthi anikele ngokwenza impilo yakhe nabo ngenxa yami. Futhi into ukuthi ngelinye ilanga ngamangala ngento eyangitshela ukuthi: "nawe nginezinzuzo zonke zokuba nomuntu engithandana naye futhi angilahlekelwanga yizo zonke izinzuzo ebenginazo ngokungashadi, bengingazi ukuthi ukujola nothile omdala kunami wayenjalo. "
Le nto yaphela lapho kufanele iphele ngezizathu ezingahlobene nobudala (njengakwezinye izithandani, woza) kepha umoya phakathi kwethu awuzange uyeke ukuba muhle futhi nesipiliyoni engicabanga ukuthi sasifanele sobabili. Kepha ngicabanga ukuthi kuhamba kakhulu nalo muntu kunezimo.