Kanye xa ungayilindelanga, kwaye kwangoko ucinga ntoniUbomi bakho bulungile kwaye unayo yonke into oyifunayo, kuvele omnye umntu. Yinto engacwangciswanga, kwaye akukho mntu uyifunayo xa ngoku ehlala ubudlelwane obuzinzileyo nobonwabileyo.
Nangona kunjalo, ubomi, kunye nemidlalo yayo engaqhelekanga yelishwa kunye nokudibana, kubeka phambi kwethu iimeko ezithile ezithi basinyanzela ukuba sicingisise ngokutsha ngezinto ezininzi. Lo creamos o no estos hechos son muy comunes, y puesto que estamos seguros que te ha ocurrido en alguna ocasión, hoy en Bezzia te explicamos cuál sería la forma más adecuada de reaccionar.
Xa omnye umntu ebonakala ebomini bethu ... kwaye sobathathu
Ukuba asinalo iqabane, le nto ilula: Yiba nesibindi kwaye uthathe umngcipheko. Ngoku, xa sele sinesiqingatha esingcono kunye nozinzo ebomini bethu, umba uba nzima. Asisengobabini, asisenguye mna nawe, kuba ezingqondweni zethu, Omnye umntu uvela ngaphandle kokukufuna okanye akukhangele, waphula loo bhalansi.
Ayikuko malunga nokujonga ukubekek 'ityala, kwaye akufuneki sizibone "njengabantu ababi" kuba siziva sitsalelekile okanye sinomdla kumntu ongelilo iqabane lethu. Kungokwemvelo, iimvakalelo azinakulawulwa, njengoko kunjalo nangomtsalane ngokwasemzimbeni kunye noluvo lokuba ngequbuliso, umntu ivusa iimvakalelo ezingalindelekanga neengcinga kuthi.
Uthando alwazi mithetho, kwaye akukho mntu ubeka "ibhawuti" entliziyweni yakhe xa ezibophelela emntwini. Nokuba sizama kangakanani, ezi ntlobo zeemeko ziqhelekile. Ngoku, njengesiqhelo njengoko zinjalo, oko akuthethi ukuba kufuneka sincame yonke into. Kuyimfuneko ukuba uziphathe ngokuzolileyo, ulungelelanise kwaye uhlale unyamekela ukuzithemba kwethu, ukuthembeka kwethu.
Yintoni esenza sitsaleleke komnye umntu?
Siyazi ukuba ayifanelekanga, kwaye kubantu abaninzi, ayinangqiqo nayo. Nangona kunjalo kwenzeka ngendalo epheleleyo, kwaye ke ngoko, kufuneka yamkelwe: ukuba neqabane akusithinteli ekubeni sizive sinomdla komnye umntu ngokunjalo.
Ngoku ... kutheni kusenzeka?
- Uya kumangaliswa kukwazi ukuba ngokophando olwenziwe ziiyunivesithi zaseColumbia, eIndiana, eKentucky naseLexington, ngaphezulu kwama-70% abantu abaphakathi kweminyaka eli-19 nengama-56 ubudala banamava le ndlela uziva ngayo ngamanye amaxesha ebomini bakho.
- Uninzi lwabantu luhlala kule meko emva kweminyaka begcina ubudlelwane obuzinzileyo. Oko kukuthi, ukusuka kwiminyaka ye-3, kwaye ngokolu phononongo, kunokwenzeka ukuba ngesiquphe siqaphele omnye umntu. Ezinye izazi ngengqondo zithetha "ngobutsha," bokufumana iimvakalelo ezintsha, Womtsalane kwizinto ezingalindelekanga.
- Kananjalo asinakho ukungahoyi ngamanye amaxesha, kwaye emva kokugcina ubudlelwane obude okanye ukuhlala olunye ubudlelwane, siyavuthwa. Kwaye nangakumbi, sicace ngakumbi malunga noko sikudinga ngokwenene okanye uhlobo lomntu olusincedayo.
Akufuneki sibhidanise ubuhlobo nothando
Ngamanye amaxesha lo mntu ubonakala ngathi ugcwalise izithuba zethu ezininzi. Kuyasothusa, kusinika inkampani kwaye kubonakala ngathi sithinta ngequbuliso uninzi lweefayibha zobuqu ezingaqhelekanga kwiqabane lethu.
Ngoku ... kodwa ngaba luthando lokwenene? Ubudlelwane bomntu bunzima kakhulu, ukuya kuthi ga apho sinokuthi sibhidanise uvakalelo lokuzithemba, ukhuseleko kunye nokuhambelana nothando. Xa kunjalo, akunjalo.
Sicinga ukuba lo mntu yile nto siyidingayo, ukuba umisela unxibelelwano olusenyongweni nobuntu bethu, kunye neenqobo zethu kunye neenkolelo zethu. Uthando alusekelwanga kweziganeko, kodwa kukwahluka ngothando, ukuthanda, kolo thando lusenza sizibuze ukuba kutheni, sahluke ngamanye amaxesha, sidinga omnye nomnye.
Kuyimfuneko ukuba wenze ngokuzolileyo kwaye ungangxami. Xa kuvela omnye umntu, uninzi lwezinto zethu zangaphakathi zibonakala ngathi ziqhekeka ngequbuliso, kodwa ukungxama akunamsebenzi kwaye abangabo abacebisi abalungileyo. Qaphela ukuba yeyiphi eyona nto ifanelekileyo ukuyenza.
Sifanele senze ntoni xa kuvela omnye umntu?
Yintoni le ndiwileyo?
Kubonakala ngathi ngumbuzo olula ukuwuphendula, kodwa ayisiyiyo kwaphela. Uthando kunye nobuhlobo ngamanye amaxesha zidlala kumacandelo afanayo, kwaye iintliziyo zethu kufuneka zigwebe ukuba yintoni kanye le ayivayo.
Ngamanye amaxesha, ngenxa yesiqhelo apho siwele khona neqabane lethu, loo mzuzu xa kuvela umntu omtsha unokusenza sifuthe kwaye senze iimpazamo. Isizisela umtsalane kwinto entsha, engaziwayo, kwaye oko kuhlala kukhuthaza.
Nangona kunjalo, kuqhelekile ukuba uninzi lwezi meko luye luphele kungekudala, kungoko kufuneka senze ngobulumko, kwaye sicinge ngendlela esivakalelwa ngayo.
Ungangxami, thatha ixesha lakho ukucinga ngaphandle kokungakhathali
Cinga ukuba ngamanye amaxesha, sinokuwela umda kwaye sibeke emngciphekweni ubudlelwane obufanayo. Ukukopela kwiqabane lethu kwaye kungekudala, ukuqonda ukuba bekungafanelekanga, bekuyimpazamo.
- Akufanelekanga ukuthatha umngcipheko ngaphambi kokuba uqiniseke. Kucacile ukuba akukho nto kobu bomi iqinisekileyo, esinokuthi sonke senze iimpazamo, kodwa ubuncinci, thatha ixesha lakho ukubonakalisa ngokuzolileyo kwaye uthathe isigqibo.
- Kukho amaxesha apho wonke umngcipheko ufanelekile, kwaye loo nto kuya kufuneka uzenzele isigqibo.
- Eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu kuyo yonke le ayikukwenzakalisa abanye abantu. Sukubangela ubuncinci beentlungu ezingafunekiyo njengokukopa ngokufihlakeleyo okanye ukuxoka. Ukuba uza kuthatha inyathelo lokuthatha umngcipheko kunye naloo mntu, iqabane lakho lifanele ukwazi ukuba uziva njani, kwaye ugqibe kwelithini.
Akukho mntu unokulawula ngequbuliso, kuvela omnye umntu ebomini bethu. Okwenzekayo emva koko kuya kuba sisigqibo sam, nangona kunjalo, ndenze isigqibo esifanelekileyo, ungaze ulibale ukuzithemba kwakho, ingqibelelo yakho kunye nolonwabo lwakho.
Ndihleli neqabane lam iminyaka emi-4; una 22 ndineminyaka engama 30. Inqaku lelokuba kwiinyanga ezi-6 ezidlulileyo ndadibana nomfazi oneminyaka engama-40 ubudala ozimiseleyo ukujongana nolwalamano olusemthethweni nokuba andinike umntwana nangona enaye. 2 ayimangalisi indlela esiqondane ngayo kwaye siyaqondana , uligqwetha ngomsebenzi, ndinokuxoxa ngaso nasiphi na isihloko esinomdla, sinenkcubeko enkulu kwaye ngaphezu kwako konke, sithandana ngokupheleleyo. Ndikwindlela, kuba ndixelele intombi yam ngale meko kwaye yavuma ukuphulukana nam emva kweentsuku ezininzi zentlungu nokukhala, kwaye inike inguquko ebomini bayo emva kwale ncoko indibhidayo kuba yenza konke ukugcina ubudlelwane. Wenza izinto angazange wazenza ebomini bakhe, izinto athe yena ngekhe azenzele zona. Uloyiko lwam kukuba utshintsho olukhawulezileyo kuba ndinazo izinto ezifanayo kumfazi omtsha endadibana naye kwaye eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukuba andithandanga nentombi yam ixesha elide, ndenze izinto ngaphandle kwesiqhelo kunye nokuzinikela.
Ndiqinisekile ukuba intombi yam iyandithanda, kodwa ngobuhlobo obutsha ndihleli ezona nyanga zimbini zibalaseleyo zothando lobomi bam, isini, ubudlelwane, ukuqonda, kunye neemvakalelo zothando endingazange ndizive nakubani na, hayi intombi yam xa siqala ubudlelwane.
Iminyaka eli-13 njengesibini esiyintombazana eneminyaka emi-6, 7 eyadlulayo ndabona umfazi emsebenzini endikhubaza kwaye andikwazi ukuthetha naye, ngokuyinxenye kungenxa yokungafuni ukukopisha nokwenzakalisa umfazi wam kwaye kuba ndoyikeka ngokunyusa, Namhlanje ndimnqumle ngokudlula, ndimjonge emehlweni ndavele ndathi molo, wandijonga, wancuma wabeka iinwele zakhe emva kwendlebe yakhe, isidenge sam siphantse saqhuma (intliziyo) kwaye yandizalisa ngexhala,
Ndiziva ngathi ndiyinto entle, eyona nto inokwenzeka kukuba ndihlala nosapho lwam kwaye ndiyaqhubeka ndiziva ngale ndlela (njenge-shit) kwaye ndilungile kuphela ukuba ndibe nobuhlobo kwaye ndenze ibali entlokweni yam, kodwa ndiziva ngokwahlukileyo indlela eyiyo. ubomi obuhlekisayo. ngokubhekisele !!