Ubudlelwane bunokuba sengxakini ngenxa yezizathu ezininzi, kodwa phakathi kwazo zonke izinto ezinokubangela ukuba umtshato wakho ucekeceke, nazi ezinye iimpawu ezibaluleke ngakumbi zokuqonda ukuba ubudlelwane bakho bunokuba phakathi kweengxaki ezifuna ukuzinikela kunye nomzamo omncinci wokuzisombulula. kubo.
Kwimeko apho uqaphela nayiphi na le miqondiso, kuya kufuneka uthethe ngayo kunye neqabane lakho ukuze nifumane isisombululo kunye ukuze singakhuli okanye siphelise ubudlelwane benu ngokupheleleyo.
Funda ngononophelo kwaye, ukuba uyazazi nakweyiphi na kwezi meko, zama ukwenza NGOKU.
- Umtshato wakho unokuba sengxakini xa uziva ngathi kufuneka uyeke indawo yakho kuba inokudala iingxaki. Ukwenza icace into yokuba sonke kufuneka silungelelanise ngendlela efanelekileyo ukuze siphile ngokuvisisana nabanye, kule meko sithetha ngabo baguqula ubuntu babo ukuya kwinqanaba lokuba bacinge ukuba amaqabane abo afuna. Ixesha elingaphezulu bayayibona impazamo kwaye bayoyika ukutshintsha kwakhona okanye ukucaphukisa enye. Ukuba ukule meko, kuya kufuneka ujonge ekunyanisekeni kuwe kwaye unxibelelane neqabane lakho ongaluthandiyo utshintsho ababenalo ngaphambili. Ukuba ubudlelwane busempilweni, iqabane lakho liya kukuxhasa. Ukuba awufuni ukuba ube yile ndlela uyiyo, singena kwindawo enzima ngakumbi.
- Ukuba omnye okanye nobabini nivakalelwa kukuba umnqweno kunye nothando ngomnye lucinyiwe. Ukuba awukhathali nokuba kwenzeka ntoni komnye ngaphezu kwesiqhelo, kukho iingxaki ezinzulu. Umsindo usabonisa iimvakalelo kwaye, ngokomlinganiso ofanelekileyo, nakwinzala, ngelixa ukungakhathali kubonisa umnqweno wokuzihlukanisa.
- Ukuba iingxoxo zisisiyatha. Ukuba bayalwa ngezizathu ebebenokungazihoyi ngaphambili, kukho iingxaki ezinkulu zokuzama ukuqaphela ngale miboniso ingenangqondo. Thatha ixesha lokuhlala phantsi ucinge ngezona zinto zibangela umsindo okanye unxunguphalo kwaye uzilungiselele.
- Ukuba bayazigxeka ngamaxesha onke. Ukuxelela iqabane lakho okanye okunxamnye namafutha, kubi, akunamsebenzi, kububudenge, ukongeza kukungahloniphi, luphawu lokuba ubudlelwane bakho bukwisigaba esibalulekileyo, kuba yonke into eyayithandwa ngaphambili ngeqabane sele ilibalekile ukuba ijolise kokubi. Ukunconywa kunye nentlonipho yinxalenye yolwalamano oluhle, apho ngaphandle kweziphene zomnye, uloyiso kunye neempawu zabo zamkelwe.
- Ukuba omnye wenu unemfihlo yangaphandle kwesi sibini. Ukuba omnye wenu unomntu omfowunelayo ukuba amxelele ngoloyiso, ithemba namaphupha akho, uyeke ukuxelela iqabane lakho iinkcukacha zobomi bakho, obukade uxelela iqabane lakho.
- Ukuba bayathukana, ngakumbi esidlangalaleni. Impikiswano iphakathi kwemida yakho, kodwa ukubiza igama akunakunyamezeleka. Ukuthukwa esidlangalaleni kunokonyusa ukuba baphula umthetho wabucala, baphule ukuthembana kunye nembeko yomnye phambi kwabanye. Oku kuyingxaki nakoluphi na ulwalamano, ngakumbi emtshatweni.
- Umtshato wakho usengxakini xa nibethana. Ukulwa ngokwasemzimbeni akufuneki kwenzeke, kwinxalenye yabo kunye nakweyiphi na inqanaba lokunyanzelwa. Abanye abantu bakholelwa ukuba uthando luya kuphelisa loo ndlela. Kodwa enyanisweni ingxaki inkulu kakhulu kwaye kufuneka isonjululwe ngobunzulu obukhulu noncedo.
- Ukuba kukho imfuneko yokulawula enye. Ukuthembana kufuneka kube yinxalenye yesi sibini, kwaye xa omnye elawula okanye enomona komnye, kukwaphula omnye wemigaqo esisiseko yobudlelwane obusempilweni.
- Ukuba akukho nto bayenzayo kunye. Nisebenza ngokwahlukileyo iveki yonke, ze ngeempelaveki nihambe ngeendlela ezahlukileyo, okanye nizinikezele kusapho ngaphandle kokuhoyana. Umgama omninzi kakhulu uphela uvelisa umgama omninzi ngokweemvakalelo. Thatha ixesha lokuphonononga umdla omnye komnye kwaye uzame ukuba neziganeko ezimbalwa kuphela.
- Ukuba yonke okanye uninzi lweemilo zakho zibangelwa lusapho lomnye okanye elinye iqabane. Ngamanye amaxesha ubudlelwane busilela ngenxa yabantu abangaphandle komtshato. Ukuba umntu ngamnye akakwazi ukulawula amalungu osapho ngokwahlukeneyo ukuze esi sibini singaziva sikhathazwa okanye sincitshiswa, kukho iingxaki ekufuneka zisetyenzisiwe ukuzisombulula ngokukhawuleza.
Kwaye wena, ngaba uyazi enye ialam ekuhlaleni kwezithandani okanye ukhe wanamava kwezi ziganeko nendoda yakho? Sixelele ibali lakho kwaye unike uluvo lwakho.
Andifane ndibenalo uhlobo lokungakwazi ukuzala ukusukela oko ndafumana imiyalezo evela kumfazi endiyenzela umyeni wam, endingenakulilibala eli binzana alibhalele yena, alinakuthathwa engqondweni yam, xa ndafumanisa ukuba kwangaloo mini ndandizokubeka ukuqhatha no ex ebenaye kwaye ebengumhlobo wakhe omkhulu kumyeni wam emva kwexesha umyeni wam ufumanisa ngento eyenzekileyo nge ex yam kwaye besizokuhamba kodwa sincokole sanika elinye ithuba, kodwa ngoku ndiphumile kunye nenye intombazana eyahlukileyo yafumana inombolo yakhe yeselfowuni kwaye yamxelela ukuba ifuna ubudlelwane nayo, le umyeni wam wandixelela yona ukuze kamva ndingothuki ukuba bayamthumelela imiyalezo kodwa ngenxa yoku, ndamthemba Kuba uyazi ukuba uzifumana engaphandle kwesixeko okoko umsebenzi wakhe ufuna njalo, ngoku bendimfowunela endixelela ukuba uxakekile ukuba usebenza late ngoba ufuna ukugqiba kungekudala abuye, kodwa undixelela lonto uzakunditsalela umnxeba ndide ndimthumelele imiyalezo kuxa ephendula Okanye uyanditsalela umnxeba, nangona besele ndiziphakamisile iingxaki zam kwaye besinengxaki okoko esithi andimthembi, kwaye mva nje akasathethi nam ebusuku ngaphezulu kwemini kwaye akasandithumeli miyalezo endixelela ukuba uyandithanda okanye izinto zesitayile, ndinokungaqiniseki ukuba bahambisa umatriki nangona ehlala endixelela ukuba ndingumfazi wobomi bakhe, uyandithanda kwaye uyandikhumbula kodwa ndiziva ngathi kuyathethwa oku kumazinyo ngaphandle okanye ukungathembani kundenza ndicinge ububhanxa ...
Balungile ngenene, ngokufanayo kwinqanaba lam, kodwa ndingongeza imiyalezo ngefowuni, ukufika emva kwexesha ekhaya iibhloko ezintathu zivela emsebenzini, izimvo ezinje ngokuba ndiza kufumana indoda yokwenyani, andonwabanga, ndifuna Ukuqwalaselwa kunye nezinye izinto ezininzi, ngenxa yokusebenza kwe «Killer windows» Andikhumbuli
Sawubona!
Ndifuna ukukuxelela ukuba xa ndifunda isihloko sabo seZimpawu zeSilumkiso soMtshato wakho, into abayichazayo yayichanekile kangangokuba iinyembezi zeza emehlweni am kwizicatshulwa ezininzi.
Kukho isihloko esingakhange ndisifumane, kwaye bengasinxibelelanisi nesihloko, ngezi alarms zomtshato kwaye kungabonakala kunomdla kum ukwazi. Bantwana, ndinenzondo nomyeni wam ngenxa yendlela yakhe yokubonisa ukuba ngutata, iingxoxo zethu zihlala zijikeleze iimeko ezinxulumene nemfundo kunye nokuhlala kunye neentombi zethu (i-9 kunye ne-3 iminyaka). Ezi ngxoxo zibangele, kwicala lam, ukuba ndive uninzi lweialamu ozichazayo. Umyeni wam ungumntu olungileyo, kodwa unyanzelekile, kwaye akahloniphi ngokuqalekisa kakubi, phambi kweentombi zam, umonde omncinci kwaye ngamanye amaxesha ndiphatha oyena mdala, ngakumbi owokuqala, endikuphephayo, kodwa ukuba vumela ndiza kumbetha. Kwaye zizinto ezindikhathazayo kwaye nangona sixoxa ngazo, ngamanye amaxesha uyavuma ukungazenzi kwakhona, kodwa mva nje akasazithathi nzulu izinto kwaye ucinga ukuba ndiyabaxa ngokufuna ukuba angangxoli kubo, angatsho ngezithuko, kwaye ube nomonde ngakumbi. Izinto phakathi kwethu zimbi. Ndinenzondo enkulu, kuba isimo sakhe sengqondo sihlala sifana nexesha eliqhushumbe, elonakalisa amaxesha okuhlala kunye rhoqo, kwelam icala ndimnyanzela ukuba abaphathe njani abantu abangamantombazana kwaye oku kuyamcaphukisa, ndicinga ukuba sikhona isangqa esikhohlakeleyo, eyona nto ibuhlungu yile yokuba lonakalisa uthando lwethu, kunye nobudlelwane bethu njengesibini, kuba njengoko uchaza, ndibeke umgama ngokwasemzimbeni nangokweemvakalelo, ndizamile ukungazihoyi izimvo zabo, ndithe cwaka kodwa ndinenzondo iyakhula, ibangela ukuba ndingayinyamezeli, kwaye ndibeke umgama wam ngokomzimba. Kuba abathethi ngendlela umtshato onokuzibona ngayo iingxaki ezithile ngenxa yokungahambelani kweendlela zokukhulisa abantwana babo, okanye izimo zengqondo zohlobo lomyeni wam ongxamisekileyo kunye nomonde omncinci. Ndiyathemba ukuba undinika ingcebiso, kuba andinaye loo mntu ndinokuxelela izinto kuye, ndiyekile ukusebenza kwiminyaka embalwa eyadlulayo, ndizinikezele kusapho lwam, umzimba nomphefumlo, kwaye ndidanile kakhulu umyeni, kuba undixelela ukuba ekuphela kwento enokuyenza yinto elungileyo, mama. Kungenxa yoko le nto ndaye ndajonga kwi-intanethi, ukuba yintoni ukuba ibe ngumfazi olungileyo, kuba okwangoku ndandingazi ukuba iza kuba yintoni. Ndiyathemba ukuba ungandiphendula ngendlela ethile, kwaye ukuba uyongeza kulwazi onalo ndicinga ukuba kungaluncedo kwezinye izibini, ndinabantu endibaziyo abalwa nabayeni babo kumba wabantwana, kukho ingxoxo enkulu malunga nemicimbi yokuba umama kufuneka abakhathalele abantwana i-100% yexesha. Kwaye kufuneka "uluse" abayeni bakho ukuba babe negalelo. kwaye ziqala apho iingxoxo. Enkosi kwaye ndiyavuyisana nawe kuba amagqabantshintshi akho ebechanekile ukuchonga ingxaki yam, ndiwukhumbula umba wabantwana. Imibuliso .... Ndilinde impendulo yakho.
Ndilifundile eli nqaku kwaye landinika amaqhuma. Ndifuna ukuziqinisekisa ukuba imeko yam yayingeyiyo loo nto, kodwa ndiyabona ukuba kunjalo. Ndineminyaka elishumi nditshatile, ndinamantombazanyana amabini (10) amancinci kwaye nomyeni wam sele endithuka ngendlela ebandayo Uyenzile ekhaya, yiyo loo nto iimpikiswano zethu ziguqukele ekubeni ngumsindo kwicala lam. Kodwa ke ikhulile kwaye ndiziva ngathi ndihlala nesilo. Ngawo onke amaxesha ndiza kubalisa eyona imbi, mhla ndathi "kwanele". Undithukile phambi kwabantu abaninzi kwisikhululo seenkonzo, kuba ndivule kancinci ucango lwemoto kwaye umoya ovuthuzayo ubethe kakhulu kwikholam, akukho enye into eyenzekileyo, kodwa ebekhwaza kakhulu ukuze eve wonke umntu. Ndazifihla ngaphakathi emotweni ndinentloni, iintombi zam zazihleli ngasemva kwaye ndaziva ndixinekile, ndifuna ukumbulala. Ke kumantombazana bendizithulele. Kodwa ndaqala ndalila ndabe ndirhabula umoya. Uqhubekile nokundithuka, ndisaqhuba, kude kube ngumzuzu othile ndacela ukuba andincede, ndilila, ndide ndimcenge ukuba andicelele uxolo kum nangentombi zethu, kodwa akenzanga nje kodwa, imeko yaqhubeka imbi. Ndamcela ukuba amise imoto, ekwakufuneka ndehle kuyo, kodwa yakhawuleza. Ndiphume kulawulo ndaqala ukubetha imoto ndisithi "ngoku uza kuyibona imoto yakho", inqaku kukuba ndiyakwazi nokuqhuba kakuhle ivili, kuba bendimncinci ndiyazithanda iimoto, ke xa ndibona lonto bekungekho mntu uvela phambi kwam, ndiye ndambeka i-handbrake ndisazi ukuba umyeni wam uzokwazi ukulawula imoto. Inqaku kukuba siphele egxalabeni kwaye ndabaleka ngamandla ndaya ebaleni. Ngalamzuzu bendisoyika eyona andiyazi, ukuba angandibetha okanye enye into kuba undikhwaze kakhulu. Okwangoku ndiyagungqa kwakhona. Ndawa phantsi ndaza ndaqala ukukhala ngendlela engazange ibekho ngaphambili, umsindo, uloyiko, imithambo-luvo, ukungabi namandla, intiyo, ingqumbo, yonke into. Kwaye amantombazana am !!! obona butyebi bam buxabisekileyo, kodwa kwangaxeshanye ndajonga ezintabeni kwaye nomoya wobuso bam ndaziva ndizingca ngokuzikhusela kulwahlaselo, andinakuzivumela isimilo esinjalo. Andifuni ukuba iintombi zam zikhule ndikholelwa ukuba kulungile ukuphathwa ngolu hlobo. Kodwa bendisazi ukuba kungekudala kuzakufuneka ndibuyele emotweni ndisoyika ukuba angandixelela ukuba ndizilahlile iintombi zam, andazi. Ndiyathandabuza ukuba ungubani kanye kanye. Asinguye lo bendicinga ukuba inguye. Ndiyoyika kuba ndisahlala naye futhi andazi ukuba inunu izophinda iphume nini. Andinokwazi ukwahlukana ngoku kodwa ndingakuxelela ukuba andisava nothando olufanayo kuye. Bendihlala ndiyithanda imbeko yakhe, ukuthobeka kwakhe, amandla akhe okufezekisa iinjongo. Kodwa ndiziva ngathi ndiyamthanda ngayo yonke into ahlala nabanye abantu hayi indlela ahleli ngayo nam. Kuba wonke umntu uyalazi elinye icala lakhe, khange aphume kunye nosapho lwakhe okanye abanye abantu ke akukho mntu uzakundikholelwa, yindoda ekrelekrele kakhulu. Kazi yintoni ngoku?
Akazange afune ukwenza izibini okanye unyango oluthile. Kwaye khange ndikwazi ukumenza acele uxolo kum kwaye khange ndikwazi ukumenza ukuba athethe ngalento yenzekileyo, akazenzi nto kwaye ndibona ubundlongondlongo emehlweni akhe, ndiye ndikholelwe ukuba unam ngamantombazana ayikho enye into. Andazi. Ngoku ndizamile kodwa ngaba ukhona umntu onokundinceda?
engaziwa
Ndineengxaki ezininzi emtshatweni wam andazi ukuba zinokuconjululwa ndinintombi ezi-2 kwaye ubudlelwane phakathi kweminyaka esi-7 sineengxaki kuba naphakade usapho lwakhe belungaphambi kokuba yonke into ingaze indixabise kwaye andisayithwali lento iyamkhathaza xa Umama uyeza ezondindwendwela kodwa xa ndisithi makahambe aye kubona umama uyacaphuka kwaye iingxaki ziqala ndinomama kuphela kunye nomnakwethu bahlala iyure ukusuka apho ndihlala khona, kodwa abazali bakhe balapha kwaye ke Ngokubanzi uyathanda Ukuhamba phantse yonke imihla akathandi ukuba ndithethe nomama kuba ucinga ukuba umama undijikela kuye Ngelishwa umama wam akazi kwanto kwaye eyona nto ihlekisayo kukuba ucinga ulungile
Inqaku lakho lihle kakhulu kwaye liyinyani enkulu xa omnye wabantu abatshatileyo ebalaselisa izinto ezingalunganga kwiinguqu zomzimba nezomnye, baphulukana nokuzithemba, imbeko kunye nobundlongondlongo kwaye kunzima ukuhlangula
themba kwiqabane lethu