Ingabe kukhona ukudalelwa othandweni?

Impela uzwile kaningi ukuthi «sasikhona okumiselwe ukwazana ". Ukuphawula okuvamile phakathi kwalabo bantu abathanda ukucabanga ukuthi ubudlelwane babo, kunokuba bube ngengozi, bunomklamo wonke wesiphetho ngemuva kwabo. Ukuthanda othile noma ukuzwa othandweni kwesinye isikhathi kusenza sidlule kulowo mbono wezothando ukungena ebucishe "bomlingo",

Kuyafaneleka ukungena kuzo zonke lezi zakhiwo zasenganekwaneni namuhla, ngombono wokufuna ukwazi, ukuzihlaziya ngokuningiliziwe. Sonke siyazi ngaleyo bhondi ekhethekile esiyisungula nomlingani wethu, kepha kude nokucwiliswa kuphela kulowo mbono wemilingo futhi okhethekile, kunesidingo sokugcina izinyawo zethu phansi ngaso sonke isikhathi. Sonke sinesiphetho, akukho kungabaza. Kepha ungalokothi ukhohlwe ukuthi simaka ikusasa ngezinketho zethu, nge izinqumo zethu. Futhi uzohlala unalawo amandla wokukhetha ukunquma ukuthi uthanda bani, ufuna ukwabelana nobani impilo, nokuthi uzoshiya bani uma ungajabule. Ngakho-ke ake sibheke yonke le mibono ekhethekile ngothando.

 Intambo yomlingo yesiphetho othandweni

Ungase ucabange ukuthi ikusasa ngokwalo elikuphonsa izinhlamvu zothando. Lowo onquma ukuthi uzomfaka kanjani nini nini lowo muntu ozoba yingxenye yempilo yakho. Ukuba nalo mbono akuyona into engemihle, kepha kufanele sihlakaniphe. Ukushiya okuthile okubalulekile njengobudlelwano bethu obusemandleni ezandleni zesiphetho kudala, ngandlela thile, ukuthi thina ngokwethu siyeke ukuba namandla okwenza izinqumo ngalokho okwenzeka ezimpilweni zethu. Kuyafaneleka ukulinganisa izikali ngaleso sikhathi. Vumela ukudalelwa kukukhohlise, kepha njalo kube nguwe okhethayo futhi onqumayo.

Ngaphakathi kwalesi sici "esikhetheke kangaka" sothando, kunemibono emibili efuna ukwazi ukuthi kufanele ikhunjulwe futhi ngokungangabazeki ezokumomotheka. Qaphela:

1. Umbono wokuvumelanisa

Alikho ithuba, kukhona ukuvumelanisa. Le mbono yayivele iphinyiselwe ngaleso sikhathi ngu UCarl Gustav JungLo dokotela wezifo zengqondo nodokotela wengqondo wayengumanduleli kaSigmund Freud wendlela yokusebenza kwengqondo, yize umbono wakhe wesayensi waqhubekela phambili kancane.

UJung wayevame ukukhuluma ngokuvumelanisa njengokuxhumana okukhethekile nokusondelene phakathi komuntu nendawo yakhe. Kwesinye isikhathi kuqhutshwa amandla akhangayo kuze kudalwe izimo eziqondanayo. Njengoba kungaba isibonelo ukucabanga ngegama, futhi, ngokuzumayo, ukubona lelo gama kuphosta yokukhangisa. Kwakhe ukuqondana kwezinto kwakungekhoKepha yebo, abantu kumele bamukele kakhulu umhlaba obazungezile ukuzwa zonke lezo zinto ezingahlobana nathi. Ngemuva kweminyaka, le ndlela ibizoqala ukuhlobana neminye imibono ye-quantum physics. Umkhakha wokutadisha onolwazi, ngokusho kwakhe, ungasiholela esiphethweni sokuthi abantu abazani ngenhlanhla. Kwesinye isikhathi, umongo osizungezile ubekiwe ukuze, kalula nje, lo mhlangano wenzeke.

2. Umbono wezintambo ezibomvu zesiphetho

Umbono we Intambo ebomvu Kuyathakazelisa nakulo mbono. Inomongo wayo enkolelweni yendabuko yase-East Asia, futhi isungulwe kahle phakathi kwabantu baseJapan. Umbono wakhe usekelwe eqinisweni lokuthi lapho kuzalwa, sesivele sanqunywa kusengaphambili nalowo okufanele abe ngumlingani wethu. Futhi le nyunyana isungulwa ngentambo engabonakali, intambo ebomvu.

Ngaphakathi kwale nsumansumane yasempumalanga lokhu kuhlotshaniswa nomqondo wokuthi kukhona umthambo oholela kusuka eminweni yethu emincane uye enhliziyweni yethu. Futhi lokho, kuboshwe ngentambo ebomvu kulowo muntu kunqunyelwe ukuba ngumlingani wethu othandekayo. Kuyisibopho esihlala sikhona. Akunandaba ukuthi kuthatha isikhathi eside kangakanani ukuhlangana kwalaba bantu ababili, kodwa lowo mzuzu uzokwenzeka esikhathini esithile ezimpilweni zethu kungekudala noma kamuva.

Lapho lowo mhlangano usenzekile, asisoze sahlukana. Isibopho sesivele siqinile futhi leyontambo isivele ihluliwe. Uma sisuka kude sizozwa a ubuhlungu akubekezeleleki…

Ukuphela kwethu konke kungokwethu

Siyavuma. Yonke imibono yangaphambilini inobuhle bayo futhi ukukholelwa kuyo kwenza ubuhlobo bethu bube bomlingo futhi bukhetheke kakhulu. Kepha kunezinto eziningana okufanele zikhunjulwe. Ukukholelwa ekudalelweni ngendlela yensimbi kusenza silahlekelwe abanye balawula umvini wethuuku. Futhi lokho kuyingozi. Ungalokothi ulahlekelwe umbono ngempilo yakho nobudlelwano bakho. Ungasho ukuthi izinkinga ezikhona manje zibangelwa izinto zangaphandle, noma ushiye izimo ezihlobene nawe ezandleni zokuhlinzekwa.

Ukugcina ubudlelwane obuvuthiwe, obuzinzile futhi obujabulisayo, kufanele sivumelane futhi abanikazi bamasheya ethu. Uthando ngokuvuleleka nangokulinganisela, nguwe okhethe umuntu oyingxenye yempilo yakho futhi okumele udlale ngaso sonke isikhathi uma ujabulile noma cha. Isikhathi ongekho ngaso, nquma ukuthi iziphi izinyathelo okufanele uzithathe. Kepha ungalokothi uyeke noma ushiye ezandleni "zento engabonakali noma engaphatheki" izinqumo okufanele uzenze wena.

Ukukholelwa kule mibono kulungile ngokwamasiko. Kusuka endizeni enelukuluku ne-anecdotal. Kepha uthando, ubudlelwano bomuntu siqu nobangokomzwelo bukhulu kakhulu ubukhulu bokulahlekelwa yinoma iluphi uhlobo lokulawula ngokwenzeka kithi nakulokho esizizwayo. Kuzohlala kunokuhlangana okungajwayelekile. Izinto zizohlala zenzeka ezibalekela ukuqonda kwethu, impilo kwesinye isikhathi iba nemidlalo yayo, kepha khumbula: yiba ngumnikazi wesiphetho sakho ngaso sonke isikhathi ngamandla akho okukhetha. Khetha ukuthi yini ngempela, yenza inhliziyo yakho ijabule.