Ngoxa i "Wendy's Complex" kunye ne "Peter Pan Syndrome" Abachazwa nakweyiphi na incwadana yezengqondo njengengxaki okanye ii-syndromes eziyinyani eziza kunyangwa, isayikholoji edumileyo ihlala ibamkela. Ezi ziindlela ezimbini zokuziphatha eziqhubeka namhlanje zibonakalisa ubudlelwane obuninzi, iimpawu zobuntu ezithile phakathi kwamadoda nabafazi, kude nokuseka umanyano olusempilweni, luphawulwa kukungakhuli.
Sonke siyamazi umntu ongaqhelekanga one "Peter Pan syndrome", akufuneki babe ngamadoda kuphela. Le ndlela yokuziphatha, ebonisa ukungabikho koxanduva kunye nobuchule obunomdla, ihlala ibonakala kuzo zombini isini ngokulinganayo. Nangona kunjalo, isifo sikaWendy sichaza indlela yokuziphatha kwabafazi abaninzi namhlanje. Apho kukho ukuzithemba okucacileyo okuphantsi kunye nengqikelelo yobuqu esekwe ngokukodwa kwiqabane. Masithethe namhlanje ngezi zinto zimbini zinomdla- kodwa ziyinyani- kwiindlela zokuziphatha kwesi sibini.
1. Isifo se "Peter Pan"
Into ebizwa ngokuba yiPeter Pan syndrome yaqala ukuthandwa ngeminyaka yoo-80, emva kokuba ugqirha wengqondo uDan Kiley epapashe incwadi edumileyo"IPeter Pan Syndrome: Amadoda angazange akhule" ("Isifo sikaPeter Pan, umntu ongaze akhule"). Olu luvo lusetyenziswa ngokuxhaphakileyo emadodeni, kodwa njengoko sisitsho, inokubonakala ngokugqibeleleyo kubo bobabini isini.
Sichaza ngoku ukuba yintoni iimpawu Abantu abanesi sifo bahlala bekho, baqulunqwa nguGqirha Kiley ngo-1983.
- Njengoko uza kukhumbula, isimilo sikaPeter Pan, njengabanye abantwana abalahlekileyo, wala ukukhula. Ihlabathi labantu abadala yayilolutshaba oluchasayo, olwaluzisa imigaqo, ulungelelwano, ubungqongqo, kunye ne-monotony ebomini babo. Ukukhula kwakufuneka kukufumene indlela yokuziphatha neyentlalo ezibasuse ngokupheleleyo kwinqanaba labo lobutsha. Yonwaba noxolo. Ke, abantu ababonakaliswe yiPeter Pan syndrome boyika ngaphezu kwako konke ukwaluphala. Ukushiya bucala ulutsha olungakhathaliyo apho yonke into ivumelekile ...
- Bahlala bengabantu abangakwaziyo ukufumana xanduva, nokuba yintoni: umsebenzi, izifundo, kunye neqabane elizinzileyo.
- Banobuntu obuguquguqukayo. Ngephanyazo bazele amandla kunye positivism njengoko nangoko, bayawa ziqhutywa yi fatality kunye ukungakhathali.
- Boyika ngokoyikekayo ubulolo. Abazi ukuba bajongane njani nayo, abazi ukuba bonwabele njani inkululeko yabo, iingcinga zabo kunye nokuzazisa. Kwaye ngenxa yesi sizathu, beza kuzingqonga nabahlobo bobuxoki abaninzi okanye abantu abathi bamise ubudlelwane obuthathaka kakhulu kubo.
- Abantu abanesifo sikaPeter Pan bathambekele ekubeni nokuzithemba okuphantsi. Bahlala bexhomekeke kubantu besibini phantse kuyo yonke into. Kodwa lumka, kuba banokuba nakho ukukhohlisa.
- Inye unyamezelo oluphantsi kakhuluZilawula kwaye ngokubanzi zizingca. Babeka iimfuno nezimvo zabo ngaphambi kwezo zabanye. Abasenzi manyathelo, abanaxanduva kwaye bathambekele ekuphatheni kakuhle ukuze abanye babe ngabo abazalisekisa iminqweno yabo okanye iminqweno yabo.
2. Isakhiwo sikaWendy
El Isakhiwo sika wendy Ngokwesiqhelo ichaza kuphela isini sabasetyhini. Inyani yile yokuba namhlanje kunokubonakala kusothusa kuthi ukuba ezi ntlobo zeeprofayili ziyaqhubeka ukwenzeka, kodwa inyani kukuba ewe, ngabasetyhini abanikela ngayo yonke into kumaqabane abo, betyeshela ingqibelelo yabo kunye nokuzithemba kwabo. Kwaye into enjalo iyingozi enkulu yokuphepha.
Kuhlala kusithiwa kuyo yonke indoda enesifo sikaPeter Pan, ikhona Wendy ogqibeleleyo, kwaye kubonakala kunjalo, kodwa masiqale sibone ukuba sibhekisa kwintoni:
- Abasetyhini abanengxaki yeWendy bathambekele ekusebenziseni ngakumbi Indima kamama kunesibini. Bafuna ngaphezulu kwako konke ukukhathalela amaqabane abo, ukuhoya iimfuno zabo, ukwenza ubomi bube lula kubo.
- Bakhathalele iqabane, abantwana, usapho, babeka bucala iimfuno zabo nkqu nezabo ukukhula ngaphakathi. Eyona nto ikhathaza kakhulu kukuba bayazi kakuhle into abayenzayo kunye nendlela abazincama ngayo ngenxa yabanye, kodwa abanakukunceda kodwa benze njalo.
- Basebenzisa kuphela indima kamama, kodwa notata. Bayabakhathalela, bazimase, bathathe isigqibo, balungelelanise, baqondise kwaye kwangaxeshanye bazalisekise iminqweno yesi sibini, bebabona njengeyona nto iphambili.
- Ukunyamekela nokukhathalela kuyabonwabisa, yile ndlela abaluqonda ngayo uthando.
- Ngamaqabane afanelekileyo Amadoda angavuthiyo.
- Ukuba kukho into eyoyikwayo ngabafazi abane-Wendy syndrome, kukuba iya kufika imini apho kungekho mntu uya kubafuna, xa amaqabane abo engasafuni okanye engafuni kukhathalelwa.
- Bazi kakuhle ukuba buyintoni na ubunyani babo, bayazi ukuba bayasetyenziswa ngamaqabane abo. Bayazi ukuba bangabo Ukuphulukana nengqibelelo nokuzithemba kwabo, kodwa yile nto bayifunayo kwaye abanako ukubonisa uthando nangayiphi na indlela ngaphandle kokuthi "bakhathalele."
- Kukho amaxesha apho baziva bekhathazekile kwaye bebuhlungu, kodwa baye bavume. Kwaye ke iminyaka kunye neminyaka zingadlula ngaphandle kokuzama ukutshintsha.
Ukuqukumbela, njengoko ubona, zimbini iiprofayili ezigqithileyo nezingaqhelekanga. Nangona kunjalo, kwaye nangona kubonakala ngathi kuyothusa kuthi, kwenzeka rhoqo kuthi kuluntu. Akunyanzelekanga ukuba sicinge ngoomama bethu, kwezozizukulwana zangaphambili apho imfundo yayixabise ukuba abasetyhini babakhathalele abayeni babo.
Ezi ndidi zeesyndromes zinokuthi sizibonakalise ngokuqina okuncinci kodwa ngendlela ephawulekayo. Ke, khumbula ukuba ungabeki iqabane lakho phambili kuphela amaxabiso okanye ingqibelelo yakho. Uthando kunye nobudlelwane kufanele ukuba ibe ngumdlalo wesibini, iqela apho bobabini batyala imali kwaye bobabini batyebisana.