Ukuwola kunamandla anyangayo kwaye aphilisayo esingafanele ukwenza ngaphandle kwawo. Ngokwezifundo ezahlukeneyo ezipapashwe kwiphephancwadi «Inzululwazi yezeengqondo«Ababini abathandanayo bahlala beqinisa rhoqo ubudlelwane kunye nokuzibophelela kwabo. Ukongeza, ubudlelwane babo buhlala buhlala buhlala buhlala buhleli kwaye banelisekile.
Asinakulibala ukuba, ngaphezu kwako konke, singabantu abonwabileyo. Akudingeki ke ukuba sithandane nje kunye namazwi aqinisekileyo okumanyana, ukomeleza amaqhina, kodwa, ukuzenzekelayo kunye nokunyaniseka komzimba kuvelisa utshintsho olumangalisayo lwe-biochemical kwiingqondo zethu ezikwaziyo ukunciphisa uloyiko, amaxhala kunye nawo onke amathandabuzo ahlala evela kubudlelwane bababini. Te hablamos sobre ello en «Bezzia»
Amandla okuwola
Kwaye u ... zingaphi iihagi ozinika usuku? Akusoze kubuhlungu ukukhumbula ukuba into elula njengokugweba othandekayo ezandleni zethu kwaye unamathele entliziyweni, luhlobo lolwimi olugqitha kumagama kwaye ngamanye amaxesha lunamandla amakhulu,
Siza kukuchazela apha ngezantsi.
Ingqondo yakho ithanda ukuwolwa
Sikukhombisile oku ekuqaleni, ingqondo yethu ithanda ukuwolana. Ngapha koko, uguquko lwayo lwenze ukuba ezo zinto zilawulwa yi-hypothalamus, i-amygdala okanye i-neocortex, zisiguqulele esi senzo njengesihle kwaye siyimfuneko, Iyasanelisa ngothotho lweeurotransmitters kunye neehomoni.
I-Oxytocin, umzekelo, yile hormone inokukwazi ukuqinisa ubudlelwane phakathi kwabathandekayo, usinika imvakalelo yokuthandwa, isidingo sokukhathalela, ukuya, ukusomeleza ngokweemvakalelo kwaye, emva koko, kusenza sizive sikhuselekile.
Loo mihla yamathandabuzo, loo mihla yokoyika kunye nokukhathazeka ...
Sonke sikhe sadlula kuloo mizuzu. Kukho amaxesha apho siwela kwisiqhelo kunye namaqabane ethu. Siqala ukuthatha izinto ngokungakhathali, siphulukana nomlingo kunye nokuzenzekelayo.
Kulapho kuvele khona amathandabuzo. Ngaba ndisaya kuyithanda? Ngaba uza kundithanda njengakuqala?
Le mvakalelo iqheleke kakhulu kulo naluphi na ulwalamano. Ngamaxesha athile, ngenxa yoxinzelelo lomsebenzi, okanye ezo ngxaki phantse ngaphandle kokwazi ukuba zihlala njani ezingqondweni zethuNgokususa iqabane lethu kwimvelaphi yokungazibandakanyi, ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo kunokubangela uloyiko luvele.
Xa kuziwa ekuthetheni ngoloyiko kubudlelwane, ezona zixhaphakileyo zihlala zilandelayo:
- Uloyiko lokushiywa.
- Uloyiko lokungcatshwa.
- Uloyiko lokuba izinto ziya kuqala ukuphuma ezandleni zethu, ukuba iimfazwe zixhaphake kakhulu kwaye asisenamonde ngaphambili.
- Uloyiko lokuyeka ukuthandeka kwiqabane lethu.
- Uloyiko lokuyeka ukubenza bahleke, lokuba nomdla kubo.
- Uloyiko lokuba nathi ngokwethu, "idangatye" liyakuphuma ...
Amathandabuzo athi asongelwe yile milinganiselo ngamanye amaxesha anokuncitshiswa ngokuwola okulula. Isizathu soku silula: ngamanye amaxesha, Nokuba bangasixelela ukuba "basithanda njengosuku lokuqala" ayithembeki kwaphela. Kuphela kuxa sifumana ukwangana okunyanisekileyo, okungunaphakade nobushushu, uloyiko lwethu luyacinywa phantse kwangoko.
Siziva sikhuthazeke ngakumbi ukujongana nehlabathi
Masibuyele umva elinye ixesha kwilizwe elimangalisayo leeurotransmitters. Asinakho ukulibala ukuba uthando sisiseko esingaqhelekanga sokwaphukelwa yinqanawa kwemichiza apho izinto ezincinci ezingapheliyo zisikhokelela kwiimfuno ezithile okanye ezinye.
Ukuba ngaphambi kokuba sithethe ngamandla e-oxytocin, ngoku kufuneka siyazi i-dopamine. I-caress, ixesha elide nelingalindelekanga, libangela ukuba ingqondo yethu ikhuphe i-dopamine. Kwaye iphumeza ntoni le neurotransmitter?
- Iyasikhuthaza, I-dopamine isitofa ngomthamo wamandla ongezelelweyo apho yonke into ngequbuliso ibonakala ilula kunye nokukhuthaza.
- Siziva sithandwa, kwaye lowo ngumfutho wamandla, izibane kunye nethemba elinakho ukunciphisa naluphi na uxinzelelo kunye nokulwa amathamo aphezulu e-cortisol egazini, oko kukuthi, loo hormone inxulunyaniswa noxinzelelo olusibangela iingxaki ezininzi amaxesha ngamaxesha.
Ukuwola okuninzi, ukugula okungaphantsi
Ngaba kubonakala ngathi kuyabaxwa? Hayi nakanye, kwaye ikwanayo nengqondo elula kakhulu. Ababini abathandanayo bahlala beqinisa ukuzithemba kwabo, beziva bekhuselekile ngakumbi, kwaye konke oku kunika impilo-ntle yangaphakathi echaphazela amajoni ethu omzimba.
- Njengokuba usazi, amajoni omzimba abuthathaka nakweyiphi na imeko yokubola, izinto ezinje ngoxinzelelo, ixhala okanye amaxhala bathambekele ekunciphiseni ukhuseleko lwabo, kwaye ke oko kusenza ukuba sengozini ngakumbi kwiintsholongwane kunye neebhaktiriya.
- Kufanelekile ukukhumbula emva koko ukuba kulungile kangakanani ukwenza ubugcisa bokuphilisa ii-hugs ezinkulu. Abo basusa ingqele, abo bakushiya ungenawo umoya kwaye badibanisa imiphefumlo, iintliziyo kunye nokudibanisa ubuso ngelixa ujonge kufutshane.
- Iyafana nempilo yeemvakalelo, kwaye xa iimvakalelo zilungile, xa siziva sikhathalelwe, xa siziva siluncedo kwaye sixabisekile, akukho nto inokusinqanda. Nathi asinakulibala ukubaluleka kokuwola kuphuhliso lwabantwana. Abancinci bafuna i-caresses ukukhula, ukukhula. Ziyi-neurons eziqhagamshela enye kwenye kwaye yiyo, ngaphezu kwako konke, uthando olugqitha ngaphaya kolusu lwethu.
Sukugcina imali ngokuwola, kwaye ukuba iqabane lakho lelinye lalawo angafane ubanike ngokulula, ungazikhawuleli. Banike ngokwakho, uvakalelo luyafana kwaye niyakonwabela nobabini. Kufanelekile! Khawusixelele… Uwange kangaphi namhlanje?