Abantwana ukusuka ebusaneni bayaliwe ngakumbi ngomnye wabazali babo kunomnye, kwaye ihlala ikhula ngendlela efanayo, oko kukuthi, abantwana basondele kakhulu koomama kunye namantombazana kooyise. Konke oku kunenkcazo yesayensi ebizwa ngokuba yi ithiyori yesini.
Le ngcamango yachazwa ngu Sigmund Freud, Echaza ukuba ukukhula komntu kuvela kwisini sabo. Kodwa le yesini ayikhange ibhekise kumxholo wendawo yobuni, kodwa ibandakanya uluhlu olubanzi lokuchaphazeleka kwabantu.
Esinye sezi zigaba zithathu sesona sichaza ngokusisiseko le ithiyori yesini, ebizwa njalo isigaba sesine, esiphakathi kweminyaka emi-3 nengu-5 ubudala, apho abantwana sele benomdla ngemizimba yabo, beyihlola befumanisa namalungu abo esini. Ukongeza, baya kutsalwa ngumahluko phakathi kwesini sabo kunye nesabanye.
Ubunzima beOedipus
Ubunzima beOedipus bubhekisa kubunzima uthando oluvalelwa ngumntwana kunina. Umntwana uziva engumnqweno wenkanuko kunina xa ebona utata njengotshaba. UFreud uchaze obu bunzima njengomnqweno wokungazi umntwana ukuba agcine ubudlelwane bezesondo kunye nomzali wesini esahlukileyo (umama) kunye nokususa umzali wesini esifanayo (utata).
Wayithiya ngegama Ubunzima beOedipus Yintsomi yamaGrike ka-Oedipus King, owabulala utata wakhe emva koko watshata umama wakhe.
Umntwana abe ngowakho Isimo sengqondo kuthintela abazali babo ekuboniseni uthando omnye komnye. Kungenxa yokuba umntwana ufuna isazisi kunye nemodeli yokuziphatha. Nje ukuba eli nqanaba loyisiwe, umntwana uya kuzama ukufana nembangi yakhe, azichonge kunye naye kwaye abe ngumzekelo wobomi.
Isakhiwo se-Electra
Kule meko, yi Uthando luvakala yintombazana kutata, Ukubona umama njengotshaba. Eli gama labelwa nguCarl Gustav Jung ukumisela umlingani we-Oedipus complex, noFreud angavumelani kwaphela naye.
El Ubunzima be-Electra yinto exhaphake kakhulu kumantombazana ngaxa lithile ebuntwaneni. Nangona kunjalo, le ntabatheko yentombazana noyise inokufikelela ngakumbi, ivelise usukuzwano olusondela kunina. Nangona eli nqanaba lihamba lingaqapheli, kuba amantombazana agcina ubudlelwane obusondeleyo kunye nonina, okwenza kube nzima ukukhuphisana naye.
Ke ngoko, ukuba isigaba sisombulula ngesiqhelo, Intombazana iya kuthatha ukoyiswa kwayo, ecinga ukuba uthando lukayise ngumama wakhe kwaye uya kukulungela ukukhangela uthando kwenye indoda. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba ayisonjululwanga, ukungaqheleki kwezifo kunokubangela.
Bamele benze njani abazali xa bejamelene nezi zakhiwo?
Ukuze inkwenkwe nentombazana boyise eli nqanaba ngaphandle kwalo naluphi na uhlobo loxinzelelo, abazali lelona nqaku libalulekileyo lenkxaso kubo ukuze bafumane indima efanelekileyo yesondo. Ke ngoko, eli nqanaba kufuneka lithathwe ngendlela elungileyo, ngaphandle kokulinika ukubaluleka okukhulu.
Kufuneka uphile njengaye into yethutyana, nangona ngaphandle kokukhathaza iimvakalelo zabantwana. Kuya kufuneka umncede ngokwenza zonke iintlobo zemisebenzi njengentsapho, kunye nabanye abantwana, ukuze banxibelelane nabanye abantu ngaphandle kwesangqa sakhe.
Ngokubhekisele kubantwana, baya kuqhubeka bebambelele kuthando loomama, kodwa umona ngakubazali babo uya kuncipha xa befumanisa izinto ezithile zokuzonwabisa ezifanayo naye, ezinje ngebhola ekhatywayo. Ngokumalunga namantombazana, ajikeleze iminyaka emi-5 okanye emi-6 ubudala, baya kuqala ukuqonda ukuba bafana kakhulu nomama wabo, ke baya kuqala ukumxelisa nokumchonga, ngaloo ndlela alibale oku kutsala kuyise.
Kuya kuba yinyani kuba intombi yam, xa yayincinci,
ibisoloko ikwicala lam.